The Powerful Man Show

What Happened On Doug’s Recent Birthday

Episode #338

Happy Birthday, Doug!

What realizations and reflections did he have while celebrating his birthday?

He woke up next to his wife in the morning and they made love right away. She prepared all his favorite food. She made an amazing breakfast. She arranged a special day just for him. It was an amazing time.

The moment she smiled and looked at him with admiration and respect, he had a moment of reflection and looked back at the way things used to be in their life.

He was thinking back to the time when he and his wife were going through a rough patch – remembering that journey between what they used to be to what they are today.

In this episode, we are going to talk about the reflections Doug had while celebrating his birthday and how to be able to get into the marriage you dreamed about when you first got together.

————-

Hungry for more?

Head over to our BONUS page for special access to some of the deeper tactics and techniques we’ve developed at The Powerful Man. 

Also listen on:

iTunes
Sticher
Spotify
YouTube

————-

Episode Transcript

Doug Holt  0:00  

I woke up in the morning, my wife and I made love right away. We still have a huge bed right next to each other. But then we go around, and now she’s got all my favorite foods like literal prep, she went to the store. Everything was crap. There were foods hidden right like treats. She made everything, so I wanted something healthier, right? So she made this amazing breakfast for coffee, filling up my coffee whenever I had it, making sure it was warm enough. And then I don’t know what’s going on. I just know that someone’s coming over. 

Hello, everyone, and welcome to another episode of The Powerful Man show. I am your host Doug Holt with my co-host Tim “The Powerful Man” Matthews. What’s going down, brother?

Tim Matthews  0:10  

Yeah, I’m doing very well. I could just tell you my weights arrived today. It was nice. So the gym is taking shape, all the floorings down the mirrors, the pull-up frames in there with the rings, a sauna, the weights to bench the sandbag, so I will never be a victim to COVID again. I’m planning for the next pandemic. Let it come round. It’s not going to take me out on my fitness.

Doug Holt  0:45  

So always you can go with that. And I’ll leave that one alone. Awesome, man. I’m glad I’ve got. I love seeing that you’re walking the walk. Right? , we teach this to the guys. So many people are out there talking about doing your morning routine, doing this, doing that, yet very few do. It’s been awesome to watch your journey as you’ve been waiting for your exercise equipment, getting your sauna and so because of being locked down there, but you’re still doing your bodyweight movements, and you’re getting a morning routine on point. Now you’re just getting more tools in the tool belt, so to speak—more things to play with, which is awesome.

Tim Matthews  1:19  

Yeah, it certainly is. I’ve missed doing the heavy lifts, being jealous as you’ve been doing the heavy lifts. But now they’ve arrived, I can kind of do that; the heavy dumbbells are 35 kilos. That’s about 90 pounds or something? Solid 70 to 2.2. Okay, well, I could do a deadlift of about 140, obviously with that, which is 70. Yeah, not that heavy, but Oh, it’s better than nothing.

So um, yeah, I’m looking forward to it. But anyway, obviously, it was your birthday at the weekend.

Doug Holt  2:00  

Yes it was

Tim Matthews  2:01  

I think you are, Don’t be fooled by Doug’s appearance guys, It’s kind of like Benjamin Button’s 16th birthday. As he ages, he gets younger. So how was it? How’s your birthday?

Doug Holt  2:14  

Yeah, awesome. Sorry. Those guys watching this on YouTube can see I have the sunlight coming right in this window I have right in front of me. So I keep adjusting and moving around, trying to; it’s a good thing to have got almost too many windows in my man cave here. But my birthday was amazing. So, it was amazing. I’ll tell you what I did on my birthday. But it didn’t use to be like that. So I got some reflection. What happened and one of the reasons that we’re creating this special group, which I’ll talk about as well, it’s a free group that we’re putting on, for the listeners that they can get into depending on when you listen to this, but you want to get in right away. But yet Tim, so what happened is I had an amazing time. I’ll tell you all about what went down. But as I had an amazing time I had that, that moment of reflection,  that that moment, we look back at the way things used to be in your life. Maybe some guys can relate to this when you’re wealthy, and you used to be poor or what have you. But for me, I remembered back at a time when my wife and I were going through our shit, really going through the rough, rough patches. And I distinctly remember a birthday. And I was going back there and, you get to a certain age where you’re not as excited about your birthday. But you kind of are right; you wake up, you have expectations. My wife and I weren’t doing as well, right? We’re going through the rough patches, I said, and I remember not looking forward to my birthday. And I know she wasn’t either. And, you can just tell when somebody’s just like, Ah, this is an obligatory thing that we have to do. And my birthday rolls around and happens to be on the weekend like this birthday. And that’s probably why it triggered it for me.

And, get up in the morning. My wife and I, of course, were sleeping next week with a California king-size bed, so a giant bed. She’s literally on one end of the bed and the other. Right, and there’s like you could have fit two people in between us. And I realized like, man, we’re right there close to each other. Both of us want to have sex, but just not with each other right now. Right? We were miles apart. I remember getting up That morning, and I remember my wife going. Yeah. Do you want breakfast? Well, yeah, I want breakfast. But it wasn’t special. It was like, Okay, I’ll make you breakfast because it’s your birthday. It was one of those two situations; nothing was planned. It wasn’t like she went out on my favorite foods, etc. And the important reason is this birthday I had today, right or this weekend, my wife went all out and the birthday since she has, but that one Remember, it just wasn’t special. Like it was kind of like, Oh, we have to do this. And there was nothing planned for the day. She didn’t plan an event or anything. And we go big on birthdays; I should say that we were dating birthdays, where we would try to outdo the other person who could do the most for the person’s birthday. I mean, we went big. I’m talking about trips, travel surprises, friends flying in from around the world, the whole shebang weekend’s like, sometimes it was three, four days at different locations, with different people hidden in the hotel, we went big. And so this one, we’re really in the deepest, darkest places of our relationship. , really where it felt like, kind of the idea of the guys talking about, like having a roommate with a ring. 

There was nothing planned. And I ended up just doing my own thing because I didn’t plan anything, right, and call my friends. I just remember going for a walk. What the hell’s going on? Why am I in this relationship? Is this worth continuing? Do what, going through this reflective moment, and here it is my birthday, right? A day to be celebrated before then I had all my boys, all my friends calling me like, hey, let’s do something. Let’s do this. Now we’re not going to do anything, etc., and here I am. Alone on my birthday, kind of by choice, right? I kind of put myself out there. Now fast forward to this weekend. And thank you, by the way. So, Tim, you made a lot of this happen behind the scenes, which I didn’t know. I woke up in the morning, my wife and I made love. Right? Right away. I mean, we still have a huge bed, but we’re right next to each other. Right. I don’t like to be cuddled. So we do have some space. I’m going to get away afterward. But then we go right out. And now she’s got all my favorite foods like prepped, and she went to the store. Everything was prepped. There were foods hidden, right, like treats. She made everything. So I wanted something healthier. Right. So she made this amazing breakfast for me, right? Coffee filling up my coffee whenever I had it, making sure it was warm enough. And then I don’t know what’s going on the day, and I just know that someone’s coming over. She didn’t have one. She had to babysit just in case for a backup. Like that’s what happens today. So she takes me out. I don’t know where we’re going. I’m driving, and she’s just telling me where to go. We end up at the foot of the mountains, as, because you took care of this as well, which you again, thank you at an amazing restaurant, overlooking surrounded by snow-capped mountains on a lake, right, this amazing restaurant eating together and just laughing and giggling and just talking about, our lives and how we’re living this dream life. Again, remember, it wasn’t long ago, relatively speaking, that we weren’t even talking to each other. Now here we are at this restaurant. That’s why I was so reflective on this coming through. And then we have this amazing meal and just giggle. I don’t know what’s going on next. And she says, hey, look, let’s go. We have an appointment. We have an appointment, that’s okay. I’m thinking, okay, we’re going to get massages because she wants a massage. Right? There, she wants a massage; she got me a massage. 

So we’re going through there. And we commit; we end up taking a 40-minute drive. Now ten years ago, that 40-minute drive would have been in silence, maybe some music, right? Hopefully, maybe a fight over the music. Maybe we were listening to a podcast on relationships or something to try to bring us together. We both loved each other. We just couldn’t figure it out. This one, no music, we’re just chatting away, talking and having an amazing time laughing. And we end up at this place. And where we go. My wife arranges for us to go ax throwing. Now it’s becoming a bigger thing here in the States. I know. It’s not a big thing in the UK. I’ve talked to a couple of guys about it in the UK. And they’re like, What are you talking about? But you go in and essentially there. There are all kinds of beers and a bar there. And she had booked for an hour and a half an amazing event for us to throw axes together. And, we had a couple of beers laughing and joking, and I got pictures which I’ll throw up in the Facebook group for the guys that want to see it. But what a different journey right here I am with a woman that I love the woman that I married, and she’s arranged this special day just for me, because let’s be real, she didn’t want to go ax throwing. She had a great time. But she didn’t want to go ax throwing. That’s not her jam. I loved its primal. We’re out there. You just throw that ax as hard as you can and get the stick right in that wood once you figure out how to do it. Right, the boom, that ability to stick it in, and having her go, Hey, let me get you another beer. , we’re laughing and giggling. It’s so infectious that people around us are watching us. We’re that couple in a good way. Whereas ten years ago, we were that couple because people will look at us and go, why are they sitting through a whole meal not talking,  what I’m talking about, you’ve seen him at a restaurant where you’re like, man, I never want to be those guys.

And slowly drift into becoming those people. And then fast forward after doing the work and getting reactivated, coming through this, and man, I just sitting there, I go to sip of beer, because you have to go outside of this cage because you imagine, it’s a retail space, there are cages up maybe six meters width, right, so about, was 18 feet, and then maybe 10 meters deeper, a little bit more than that, you throw in these axes. You’ve got to go outside of that cage to have a drink of your beer, and you can’t bring it in the cage. And my wife’s there. And she turns around and looks at me with this ear-to-ear smile. And just this look of admiration, respect for me, and the life that we built the work that I put in, right, because I had to clean up my side of the street first. And it just totally hit me. At that moment, I reflected on that previous birthday, that birthday where I was walking alone on the beach, going? Is this even worth working on? Is this even worth me taking my time? Why should I have to work on myself? And think about why I should seek to better myself when she was the problem, right? The thing is, and that journey between that old birthday, where I was by myself to this weekend, which was friggin amazing, was the only thing that changed was choosing to work on myself. That’s the only thing that changed. And I was sitting there, and quite honestly just admiring myself. Right? Now, I’m not supposed to say that from an ego standpoint, but it’s kind of like, dude, you did it. You stepped out; you didn’t just talk about it, you didn’t just think about it, you put your money and your time where your mouth is, and you did something about it. 

Hey, sorry to interrupt the show. But I wanted to ask you a question. Do you ever feel like something’s just missing, like there’s something more out there, and you just can’t put your finger on it. I get it to go over right now toThePowerfulMan.com/bonus to discover the system that other businessmen just like you are using. We’ve included 10 case studies of ten men just like you who have found the solution and have found their way on their path. But we want to share that with you. Go over to ThePowerfulMan.com/bonus right away. Now let’s get back to the show. 

We did a previous podcast on increasing your sexual market value. Back then, I ran a gym. I was fit to play competitive soccer at an older age, so I had to be fit to play with the young bucks right, so I was playing with guys that were right out of college and some playing pro ten years younger than me. And I was starting over, so the physical game was there. It was the internal game that caused me to get deactivated. Right, I was running multiple companies, so on paper, I had all the checkmarks, man, but the difference was the inner game. So when I look back at that with reflection and just what we’ve been able to build and do that, and I look at this last week and celebrating my birthday with my family and how amazing it was, two days filled with love and joy honoring me, right? The second day. My wife came, so it was Saturday, Sunday. The wife says the same thing. We got breakfast. It was amazing. She got all my favorite meals and snacks, and she said I got the kids, you do whatever it is you want. This is your day and not from a place where it was where she didn’t plan anything. But from a place of just honoring me, she’s like, you work so hard for our family. You’ve done so much. You’re the leader of the family, and you get to recharge your batteries; massage, let me know what you want to watch. You want to binge Netflix, and you do it right. I got all the responsibilities of the family, and I got everything taken care of. I just want you to fill your cup and talk about being seen as a man as a provider and being treated like a king. Like that is a different flip. That is a 180 coming back. So, man, my birthday was amazing. I talked to you on my birthday; obviously,  I appreciate the call and helping set things up. It was generous of you in doing so, and just, it was really fun and getting that all done. But man, when I look back at the reflection and coming from where we used to be to where we are today, it is amazing. And that’s why I talked to you, and I was like, dude, we got to do something for these guys, we got to do something. And guys, if you’re listening to this, we decided to put together a group. It’s free, right? It’s only going to be, and it’s going to be three weeks. It’s how to seduce your wife in 60 seconds or less. Because literally, I figured out how to do it in my relationship in 60 seconds or less. And we want you guys to have that change, too. So this is for the Doug one-point O’s out there. Love you guys. And I want to make sure you guys have the same situation.

Tim Matthews  14:21  

Pretty Curious, I can’t get it down to 58 seconds,

Doug Holt  14:26

58 seconds. I’m Working on it, man, but

Tim Matthews  14:31  

Playing all the 60 seconds is too long. I’ve got it down to 57.

Doug Holt  14:36  

We know what it is. Tim, we talk about the scales, right. And the reason we talk about the scales is this weekend, and my wife is stacking the scales in the good experiences, the good memories. I didn’t. We didn’t sit there and reminisce about the bad things that happened, the things I did, the things she did, the things I didn’t do, the things she didn’t do. Right, we weren’t worried about it. That’s what therapy does, right? Therapy doesn’t work for most of the men we work with because it’s like driving your car in the rearview mirror. You’re looking back; my point of reflection was a point of clarity on the weekend. It wasn’t from reflecting on the past, as much as it was like, Oh my gosh, like, this is the marriage. I dreamed about it when I got married, and I’m living it. Versus this is the nightmare, you see in movies that you swear you’re never going to become that married couple. And it’s a big difference. And so yeah, getting it to 60 seconds, sushi weapon, 60 seconds, is part of that journey. Me and the rest of the guys, when I shared it with them. We want other men to experience these rights and to be able to have this in your life. We’re doing this completely free, it’s going to be a private group. To get in, you do have to go over to The Powerful Man. The Facebook group gets accepted into that group, right? That’s also a free group. It’s not what I’m talking about here, right? And just fine, there’s going to be a post by the time this goes out. And just type in the word seduce, right, that’s going to be the way, and the only reason we’re having guys do that is so somebody can get your name, say, hey, great, here’s a link to the group, the group is only going to be going for three weeks. Once it’s done, it’s done, right. And the reason we’re doing that is that we have found over the years, I was so guilty of this man. I used to go from a podcast, a podcast, of course, to the course from book to book and not take action. So we’re giving guys a defined period of time where they’re going to get coaching by me, and the other coaches will be in there too, on exactly what to do and exactly how to do it so they can get the result. And if you don’t take action, you’re out of the group, right? We want guys committed to doing; these guys are like, I’m ready for a change. Right? And this is going to be their first entree, the first start into actually getting these results that they deserve—right getting it back.

Tim Matthews  16:55  

I think it is worth mentioning as well. I think one of the things you guys are going to learn in this group; you might be listening to thinking for 60 seconds; come on, it’s just unbelievable. The thing is, when you learn the dynamics and what you can do, the fact of the matter is so easy to make it happen within 60 seconds because it’s kind of like Think of it this way like a fire right to get a fire going in the beginning. Now it takes a little bit of work; you got to put the kindling down. You depend on it like the fire, but Kimberlin may sometimes get the kindling going to pull a few logs on taking care of it. Well, That one’s the fires burning. Are you going to do that a log now and then and keep standing the heat that already keeps the fire going? Right? And, I imagine that just imagine that as you guys think about 60 seconds. How is that possible? Once you get that fire burning,  what to do? And, it becomes much easier to stock it. Yeah, guys,

Doug Holt  17:55  

we’re going to go into exactly how to do it, man; it’s going to be a step-by-step process for the guides. Again, it’s free, and there are no strings attached or anything like that. And then a shout out, so many of the guys who listen to the podcast reached out to me through various channels on LinkedIn and Facebook. And what have you, thank you so much, guys, I, I just it’s hard for me to get back to all those messages. So I apologize if I haven’t gotten back to you personally, I definitely will do my best to do that to everybody, but I greatly appreciate it means a lot to me. , obviously, Tim and I spend our time doing this for you guys and getting it out there. So hopefully, you’re getting value as well. So guys, if you’re interested in it, jump on over, go over to the Facebook group to search for The Powerful Man. There’s a group there’s, I think. I don’t know 10 three questions you get asked, then the lead in it’s only for business owners. It’s just the guys that we work with our business owners. I’m a business owner; it works for me. So I know the different issues that business owners face that most guys other than aren’t business owners don’t. There are just different things going on. There’s no disrespect to anybody else. We want you guys to get the results too. But this is specifically for business owners. I’m just going to show you step by step how I do it right in 60 seconds or less, how to seduce your wife and get her there. And it’s an amazing thing. 

And it works well. And as Tim said, it’s stoking the fire. And we’ll go into the step-by-step process on how that’s done. So make sure you go over that Facebook group. Do it. If you’re watching this on a replay, like you haven’t got this when it came out, I apologize if the group’s already closed guys, this is we’re closing it. It’s a tight-knit group. It’s a very step-by-step process that we do. Because we know that process works. We’re just not going to be able to let guys in after that time period. I know some of you guys who missed the last one we did for free. We’re a little bummed on that. But if you’ve been through it, then exactly what kind of results happen. So, Tim, again, thank you for the birthday wishes, and it was great to be able to do that and be able to reflect and take the time to think about the journey, right? The journey from what felt like how really to write feels now is almost unbelievable. Pinch yourself. Type, lifestyle. And so, so much so that we’re going to put a little area to throw axes on our property. So Oh, come to the States. , we’ll have it out there for you. We’ll have a couple throwing axes, and we’ll go out there and maybe have a beer and throw some axes.

Tim Matthews  20:32  

As long as that guy’s not there, he doesn’t Cut his toenails. He spoke about another episode. Yeah, look, dude, you deserved it. , it’s an honor and a pleasure to be able to do that for you with the woman that you love. And she certainly, obviously, what you don’t know is a Hey, I want to do something with Doug’s birthday. Do you get any plans? Well, free should say that. So yeah, she completely, she even directed me on it. So yeah, he still I love that you gain on it in that way. You fully deserve it. For the man that you are and all the work that you do, and just, I don’t need to go into all the reasons, but I’m glad you enjoyed it. So yeah, good for you.

Doug Holt  21:15  

Thanks, brother. Thanks. Well, gentlemen, that’s a wrap for us. The Powerful Man show always takes action. Don’t be like the old me. Just go from podcast to podcast, come up with one or two insights you guys have here, and just take massive action now. Right? If you’re on the road you’re driving, leave yourself a voice note. If you’re at the gym, schedule something in your calendar; right now, you can do it. It’s up to you to take action. Guys, we’ll see you next time on powerful magic.

THe latest and Greatest

How To Go From Force To Power

In this episode, we’re discussing the four stages of consciousness and how to stand by your convictions. Believe in yourself and live your best life – because life starts by saying “YES” to more things.

Read More »

Is The Grass Greener?

In this episode, Tim and Doug talk about some reasons why you might be assuming that different situations will bring you greater joy and how to engage more with your wife. Be grateful for what you have and work on yourself.

Read More »

Reignite
Your
Marriage

Get this FREE Reignite Cheatsheet from The Powerful Man! Put the spark back into your life, your marriage, and your happiness NOW.