What does effective leadership look like?
A successful leader is more of an adviser, a mentor, and a coach. It allows you to lead on a higher level.
The most common mistake people make when leading teams is trying to “lead-by-consensus”. Maybe it’s fear, or a genuine desire to do right by those you lead. But leadership-by-consensus most often produces a team that is stagnant, unmotivated, and entirely lacking any clarity.
Take that leadership role. Take charge as a leader – not as a dictator, but more as a guide.
In this episode, we are going to talk about how to lead effectively, common problems that arise in leading teams, and the steps we can take to allow us to be successful and effective leaders.
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Head over to our https://www.thepowerfulman.com/the-alpha-reset/ page for special access to some of the deeper tactics and techniques we’ve developed at The Powerful Man.
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Doug Holt 0:00
When it comes to leading teams, I think a common mistake that I see I go in and do consult, right, I’ll go in as a consultant, whether it be an interim CEO or CMO role, or as The Powerful Man we go and consult businesses from a leadership standpoint is I do believe that the big problem with a lot of companies is too many chiefs. Not enough Indians. But what I mean by that is people are leading by consensus, not by leadership.
Hello, everyone, and welcome to another episode of The Powerful Man show. I am your host, Doug Holt, with my co-host, Tim Matthews. Tim, how are you doing, brother? Awesome. Well, guys, jumping right into it. Tim, you had an interesting topic that you wanted to bring to the table. So go for it.
Tim Matthews 0:27
Yeah, I mean, we’re just jumping back and forth, right. And we were talking about the idea of the guys that we spoke with yesterday, in particular, he believed that the problem within his business that we’re experiencing was completely separate to the problem at home. Yet the problem at home as they didn’t respect his wife or kids and had to keep up and keep on asking them to do things. And they wouldn’t listen to him. And they would follow through. And in the end, he just took it and did it. He stepped in and saved them and stole the show. Guess what I struggle to do in this business free up time, I struggle to free up time in his business because the sad part of that showed up in his relationship, and his family was the same thing that was causing him to hemorrhage cash in the business. And he thought, well, maybe I’ve got the wrong people. Great leader, not saying he’s not a great leader if he’s listening, but believing, not failing to see the pan. And then when someone points it out, backing it up with while I’m a great leader. And funny, but even if you are, you get to improve because there’s a thing here that showed up. So I wanted to talk about anyway: how to lead a team effectively, because you know, you’ve led teams for 20 years, maybe thereabouts. And, you know, I’ve had them for a long time. It is not as long as 20 years, just because I’m a lot younger and better looking and less gray and fitter and stronger.
And you know, what, even wiser, so it’s a positive that I haven’t read them for as long. But anyway, I thought we could just sprinkle some of the top lessons/advice. Yeah, top lessons, some things we have learned over the past few years. But I think as well with our team, as we have a team spread across the world, literally from Pakistan to Bend, Oregon, literally across different time zones. And all the people are full time or very high, just below full time. So being able to create a culture of being able to create leadership roles, create ownership, accountability is very important. I need to have the, you know, the advantage of being in an office environment, which I think if we were in an office environment, man would just take it to the level even still. So to hear this guy who isn’t in an office environment, and I’m sure many the listeners might be as well at times, Although to be fair, COVID tips are things a little bit remark. Nevertheless, I’d love to sprinkle in some advice for these guys. So I just thought we could go back and forth and share some of the top tips that we’ve learned. And I wonder whether as the guys listen to this, I invite you guys also to see how I can apply this not only in my business but also at home as well either in my marriage or with my kids, where the parallels crossed because there are a lot of parallels. So on that note, Mr. Doggy is fresh. In fact, besides it, how are you, Doug?
Doug Holt 3:49
You know what, I’m having a fantastic day, Tim; I got down here early in the morning. I have a water rower. So it’s like rowing in the water.
Tim Matthews 3:55
Doug Holt 3:56
and just had a great rowing session. You know, get to talk to the guys you’re here, but that’s okay.
Tim Matthews 4:06
So yeah, guys, Doug was giving me some crap before the call, saying, hey, you know, you could ask me how I am. And when he did, that’s why he didn’t call me Tim the power from Matthews. Hence my silence. Yeah, there you go. We’ve got it in there. So yeah. Anyway, Doug. Cheryl wakes up. I think you’ve got some real wisdom to share on this topic when you’re a great leader. I’ve learned a lot from you. It doesn’t tell you this, but I’ve learned a lot from you over the past few years, and you are a great leader. So, yeah, sprinkle some magic in foolishness.
Doug Holt 4:37
No, thank you for your generous compliment. Not sure how deserving it is. But, you know, I got this gray hair at a young age. And it wasn’t until I started, a year after I started my first brick and mortar company, not my first company, but my first brick and mortar company, and managing a lot of people within that company, the different divisions, etc., that the gray hair started popping in. So if that gives you any indication of why I have gray hair, but you know, I think a common mistake that I see when it comes to leading teams. I get to give the listeners a little perspective; besides our own companies, I go in and do consult, right, I’ll go in as a consultant, whether it be you know, an interim CEO or CMO role, or as The Powerful Man, we go in and consult businesses, usually guys that are in The Brotherhood or the inner circle, have us come in because we’ve got the systems dialed in. And I share that with you. Because what I think is important, from a leadership standpoint, is I do believe that the big problem with a lot of companies is, you know, too many cooks in the kitchen, right. And I think that’s probably nowadays politically incorrect to say. But what I mean by that is, people are leading by consensus, not by leadership—going through it. And so it’s the leader who wants to be liked first. Right. And that’s not the position a leader should be in now. It’s great to be liked. I like to be liked by him. I like people to like me. But at the end of the day, the way that I look at it now is my job. And I go in, and I’m very nice, very affable. If you ever see me in these situations, right, take over a team. And I’m very happy. Hey, Tim, how are you doing? Great, you know, but at the end of the day, the decision and the way the meeting structure goes has to fall on me. And the way that I look at the paradigm I take into it, Tim, is my responsibility for their families to get fed that this business is successful. Because we can all have Kumbaya and be happy and sing around the campfire and the business can go under no one’s got a job. Whose fault is that? The leaders.
Tim Matthews 6:53
but he’s singing Kumbaya, you are nice and warm around the fire. And you know, life is good.
Doug Holt 6:57
you can’t buy firewood. So the point being was, since right, you talked about this going back and forth. The first thing I would say is to take charge as a leader. And don’t take charge, in my opinion, as I’m a leader, I’m the dictator, you have to listen to me. No, no, don’t do that stuff. Take charge in the sense that you are the leader. And this is the way it’s going to be and take a consensus. There’s no difference between leading a business and leading a family. In my experience, right. There are some subtleties. There are nuances, right, but at the same time. So when you go into a presentation, guys listening to this, guys who are listening to this have more experience than I do. But when I go into a new team or an existing team, right away, we always have the chit chat. And then I just take charge. Right. The last company I did consult for the year, aware of it, was like mayhem, and everybody was a chief; everybody was talking over each other. And I would say, Tim, that’s a great idea. But that’s not on point right now. I’ll come back to you. And the guy would interrupt and go, nope, this is not the right time for you. And everybody got Hush, and this is what we’re doing. This is the direction we’re going, gentlemen. Let’s move forward in this fashion. Okay, great. And you’re taking that leadership role, and you just need to take it, and that’s also my leadership style, more naturally. So anyway, point one is the biggest problem I see is leaders want first to be liked rather than lead. And I think that’s a huge mistake that a lot of leaders make.
Tim Matthews 8:40
a second mistake. Well, another mistake, and I’ve been guilty of this in the past, is, and you know, when you solve this, and I’m sure a lot of the guys listening do this anywhere. But it’s also very easy not to do it because you can get swept up with the business’s business, right? Are they when they lead the make it about them and the numbers in the business instead of making it about the sales guy on the sales guys, but the team right and why I said sales guys excited one to one with one of our advisors today. And the one to one. A big part of it is, you know, that we have a philosophy that everybody wins, right? Yep. The men that come to us get served to a high level there when the movement has cash, it can reinvest into the movement and do things like there’s so many who have coming up and on profit, the movement wins the team, they get to win, they get to live a great life, they get to get paid. Well, they win. So everybody gets to win, right? So point being is the one to one that we have today. On top of the one-to-one, it’s like, right, so what is your personal goal? And I’ve got the number just to represent the individual. And beneath that, it says why. And he let him have a list of four bullet points of why that number means something to him. And many things like why now. And he’s got, you know, so that’s how we start the one to one, it’s like, cool. So how are you doing with your girl? Basic cares have a line in the actions in his day and his week to achieve his goal? Hey, you know, I’ll probably get him unplugged a bit today and said, Hey, you know, is that why you want to get cash? So you can buy that house because it is clear that they are gone on that holiday? Is that really why?
But what wasn’t provided with what’s a real deeper Why? Maybe it’s because he wants his wife or his kids to look up to him. And remember a time when daddy bought his house on the beach, or whatever it is, whatever it is to him, right? It’s not a real deep sense of meaning that we encourage our team to tap into. And then also the idea of why now, right? Why must this be a non-negotiable for you today? Why not achieve this in two years? What is it, and I think, you know, just on the side, as a problem with a lot of goals that people set, the set goals are too far out from where they are. And by default, they’re a little bit unbelievable. And they know that they’re unbelievable, but we think it’s a stretch, but the stretch is just too far. So with this guy, we got him to make it relevancy may feel like a little bit of a stretch, but he’s doable as well. And he’s about 60% of the way there; this act is along this month, and I’m super excited; he’s going to hit it. He’s, you know, an overachiever dog. You don’t know this yet. It does not speak about yet, but he’s going to overachieve it. So what this does by making it about him than his goals and his motives, and then aligning his weekly activities and outcomes to His goal is that when it comes to accountability, as a leader, you can then, as Doug says, You’re taking charge, you can then take charge and hold accountable from a place of, Hey, I’m holding you accountable to the standard that I see you at, not where you are today. But the standard that you’ve told me that you want to be out, that’s the place I’m coming from. And right now is a gap. Right now, you’re not there, and I’m not going to let you settle for anything less. When you do like shifts, something shifts within the person because they realize Hang on a minute, I’ve got someone in my corner here. And I honestly mean it; I’m honestly making it about them. It’s not I’m not trying to manipulate. So that is about the movement. By default, the movement thrives anywhere, right. But what happens is that person feels very loved, supported, seen. And they go the extra mile. And they also then hold the people in the team accountable in that way; I think it is a very powerful thing. It’s very, again, like I said at the beginning, very easy not to do to skip that part in the beginning, but also very easy to do.
Doug Holt 13:07
What? Yeah, I agree 100%. And there are two nuances that I want to make sure guys are picking apart here. And I’m sure they picked up on this is there are two different things you talked about that he rolled into one. And that’s what a good leader does is you find out a way to make their goals and their dreams align, so to speak, without the movement or the company, right. In other words, this individual wants to buy a house cool. How can you do it great? You view you sell x widgets or services or what have you. That gets at equals a house. Let’s make sure we have the tools available for you to do that. Right. That’s the one-second thing you said is standards. You’re saying you want to play at this level. Right? Everybody says they want to be a pro. But very few people make it to the pro level. Right? We think about it. You can use any sports analogy you want to make to very few people at the high school level, let alone the pro level, right? Going through. And you set the standards. Hey, look, you said you wanted to do this. I didn’t say it. You said it. So I’m going to make sure you get there. And that Tim dovetails into one thing that I think is important, which will be my next one. I know we’re going to wrap up here soon. But I commonly get asked how do you run successful multiple successful companies? Or how do you run multiple successful teams, and the truth is, all I do is coach them. I coach the other leaders of those teams, and they’re able to run it, right. And I think that’s where a successful leader is more of a mentor and a coach and less of a Dewar. Right, per se, right? That doesn’t mean that, hey, in your business, you could be the guy, right? You know, traction is a great book, we talk about a lot, the EOS entrepreneurial operating system in The Powerful Man, a lot of our guys run their companies on this. And there is an integrator or is a visionary, and there’s nothing wrong with any of these roles. I just want that caveat out there. But what you want to be doing any time you’re doing this, and amazing with the division that you’re running within The Powerful Man, is you coach the people in there, you serve more as a coaching role. And I believe that you coach them in their business skills and their personal life.
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What I’ve found is, you know, it’s like people don’t care too. They realize how much you care about them. That’s not the same, but you can think of it right now. But that’s pretty much what it is. And when you’re coaching them on their business skills, whatever their job function is, you’re giving them opportunities for growth in that area. But you also want to coach them in other areas, right? We had The Powerful Man use the five territory’s self, right? What are they doing for themselves to fill their cup? We’re adamant about guys taking time off and doing those things. Health, we got a guy on the team right now who is going through some major health problems, and we’re creating an environment for him to get better, right?
Wealth, like what’s going on there, where your contributions and wealth are much more abundant, right? So it’s much more than just money. Going through their relationships is a huge one. We talk about guys. How’s your marriage going? How are your kids going? Your girlfriends, I’m going all the guys are married? Right? What’s going on there? Yeah. And business. And that comes back to making sure that they’re growing? Where do you want to be to your point, Tim? So I think being that advisor, that coach, that mentor really allows you to lead at such a higher level than you are, and I can already see it; I’m just going to add this in, Tim. Because I’ve talked to guys who said, Doug, got a couple 1000 employees, I can’t coach them. Well, you can coach your C suite, right? Just coach your C suite. That’s it. Or maybe just a few members of your C suite team or a few members of your downline. You don’t have to coach everybody in your company. And you can effectively coach everybody in your company if you’re utilizing video recordings, skill sets, exercises, you know, a lot of the guys in The Brotherhood and the inner circle, which are the two different one-year programs that we run, they’ll take the things that they learn from us. And they’ll flip them and turn and teach their teams, and their teams eat it up. Right? They love it because they’re getting continued growth. And the guys see huge returns in their ROI with just doing that.
Tim Matthews 17:31
Hmm. And the next one, I’d say, is that in terms of mistakes, let’s say leaders sometimes preach what the dollar always does themselves, I don’t know. It shows a more eloquent way to say that that probably rhymes but walk the talk, whatever you want to say, it feeds into the whole five territories living from the inside out, right? Yeah, that’s what I love about those by default whenever we interview somebody, right, so is a case of right what we ask them, what’s the morning routine? What do you do? What do you do to switch off after work? What are you doing to work out right now? And if you don’t have a morning routine and are not working out, and they don’t do, they don’t, they don’t progress any further than the first 15 minute kind of triage interview because they’re not walking the talk. They’re not there in the mindset. That isn’t going to work for us because we’re very big. And I said on a previous podcast that the thing that often drives me to overcome certain challenges in my personal life is the sense of accountability that I have to the guys listening and the clients we serve. It’s very important that I and we, as a team, walk the talk, right, so the point I’m making is with a leader. I think you hit the nail on the head; it’s very important to be seen. I don’t care how many employees you’ve got with technology these days; it’s very easy to do it. So economies upon the workplace do lives that can do tons of things to be seen. And it’s so important for you to be walking the talk. And should you need to be able to step into any role in that company, perform excel in it, as well? It might not Excel overnight, and I remember a story I was getting told.
And it’s about somebody who was sitting in his restaurant having dinner that he owned, and he spied that the dishes were coming out dirty or slow or whatever, say went in the back and noticed that there was a big pile of dishes that were just stacking up. So right there and then roll the sleeves up, start washing the dishes, and the dishwashers like whoa, what are you doing? I’m washing the dishes. Oh, I mean, the stat we need to get them done. The coming out is dirty. That’s not good enough for people, and they’re, they’re working hard. They’re spending the money here. This is an important occasion for them. They deserve great service. And he just cleans this stack of dishes quickly to a high standard, and the dishwashers like whoa. They walk back out and sit back down. Quiet American is you get to be seen; you get to lead from the front. And again, bringing it back full circle to the guy I originally thought of what we opened up this episode for him. If he’s got a high turnover staff and he’s struggling to get respect. At home and work, then is he respected himself? How does he dress when he’s walking into the office of either the store that he owns? Does he look after himself? Does he? Is he unhappy? Or is he light and jovial if he’s not the kind of guy that looks like he respects himself? And how can you expect other people to respect him? just not going to happen? So don’t be asking people to do things that you’re not doing yourself.
Doug Holt 21:06
Yeah, and I think that’s all relative to right, and there are certain skill sets you’re not going to have as a leader for sure. But what goes into it because right after this recording, guys, we’re going right into an all-hands meeting with everybody in the company, and what are we talking about, Tim?
Tim Matthews 21:20
Doug Holt 21:22
And what are the core values for The Powerful Man?
Tim Matthews 21:25
um, we still decided on that we will have them by the end of this we got it down to live it’s out laughing out call out sought out which everyone’s like, well, what are those mean and all the team have been going away and, and diving into those and my suggestions Doug for living it out, it’s going to be on lines of living from the inside out. I’m going to give too much away. And then the other one is going to be led like a wolf, who’s in the anagram of wise, open and loving, fierce but fiercely competitive, got a few other ideas. So I’m excited to share them with the team, see what they bring. I think we’ll end on some great ones.
Doug Holt 22:05
Yeah. And so the reason I bring that up is, is one is we’re walking the walk, we’re doing this again, with a team, we’ve had core values before revisiting them as the team grows, we’re allowing the team to contribute, but we’re leading the team in this contribution, right? We’re pre-framing things. And this goes into my next leadership thing is learn the psychology of people and be able to pre-frame and lead a conversation in a meeting or within your team, right, be able to lead them down the road, essentially, that you want them to go down but be open to offshoots of this road. I’ve seen some of the best business decisions and moves made by people on the outside that are in a meeting, who have just raised their hand and just saw it because of a different perspective, either they’re not in the same industry, different dogmas coming through, and they’re able to do it. And as a leader, I think you need to be open to alternative points of view, right? You’re leading the conversation, and you’re leading the meeting, as we’re talking about, you’re holding people to high standards, you’re advising them but truly approaching it. And this is hard as you’re not the smartest guy in the room because most of you guys will be the smartest guy in the room. Approach it that way. You’re leading it. Yep. Great idea, Ted. But this is the way we’re going; you get to make the ultimate decision. And something I often say Tim is, hey, look, these are an awesome idea. Got ideas, guys. Somebody’s just got to make a decision. And that decision falls on me. And this is what we’re going to do. Right. Everybody on board.
Great. You know, and then I, you know, I’m adding a couple more, and I’ll give one more because I know we’re coming up just to get buy-in, right? I see so many leaders not doing that. Right? So hey, we’re making the decision. We’re going to do the core values. These are the core values of the company. Is Tim that works for you? Yes or no? Yes, great, Jim, Rick Susie Frank, and go down, and you’re getting buy-in. This gives people a chance to have an objection, right. It’s kind of like sales. And then they can voice their opinion and feel that they were heard. Because otherwise Frank or Susie, they walk away pissed off, they’re not going to get buy-in for the meeting or wherever the leaders take them. So you give them the opportunity they make, make it as such that they feel their voices heard. By the way, guys, same at home, the same at home. Yep, make sure their voices are heard. And you, as the leader, are still making the decision that you feel is the best. And if a team believes you and believes that you care about them, which wraps up a lot of the other things that we brought into, into play here, they will follow you to the ends of the earth, right, and they will play full out, you’ll get better productivity out of them. They will be happier, you’ll be happier, and your customers will be happier. So Tim, how do you want to wrap this one up? What what are a couple of things that guys can do a
Tim Matthews 25:00
a couple of things in relation to this sit-down, take some notes and apply them one at a time. There’s so much gold in here a couple of things to do, I do believe, sit down with this look, where do you lack in in some of these areas, which one of these is going to be that tiny hinge that will swing the large door, maybe it’s the buy-in? Maybe it’s the ability to lead from the front by taking charge, whatever it is for you. But also, as I said, I’d invite you to reflect on which ones are showing up in the biggest way for you know, if they’re all interrelated, but look at other areas of your life as well. What could your relationship be with the kids, your wife, because they will be mirrored? And you know, that might give you an indication as to where you get to focus first on these, don’t try to do them all at once. Because it’s quite a lot. Take your time to do one at a time. And you know, I mean, you could spend a year doing these, quite honestly.
Doug Holt 26:04
a lot of subtleties that go into these. When you know, we talked about these, and we’re doing a whole training on this for the guys in The Brotherhood coming up. on how to apply these. Tim has always loved you bringing this to the table. And guys, as always, take action, right, just take massive, massive action. Tim and I have spent any right now; we always have a coach or mentor in our corner who’s further ahead. And we’ve spent countless money on countless dollars on leadership coaches, training, videos, workshops, etc. And as Tim mentioned, for over 20 years, I’ve been leading teams, and most of that time, not. Well, I’ll tell you that I did not do well, it’s taken a lot of mistakes to get there. So give yourself some grace as well, guys, as you’re going on your journey no matter where you are, whether you’re running a 6789 figure company or not. And then, you know, just realize it’s just like anything else is stepping stones. But one other point I want to drive home for probably the third or fourth time is guys. These techniques apply at home just as much right subtle nuances and changes and shifts. But for the most part, you can do this exactly at home. Have your core values for your family. What does it mean to be a Holt or a Matthews? Or Smith or whoever it is? What are your values? How are you leading? How are you making decisions about finance and things like that?
You can do the same thing and take that leadership role, and remain activated. And that’s the key here. Gentlemen, as always, go over to ThePowerfulMan.com/Bonus if you haven’t already. Every month we’re going to be changing that bonus for you. That’s ThePowerfulMan.com/Bonus; we’re going to be giving you free training every month, right every week on the podcast, we also give you a free worksheet. So tons of resources. So the excuse of money we’ve thrown that out of the way, right, we’re also bringing you the shows, we’re also going to be adding more stuff on YouTube on our YouTube channel. So the excuse of not enough time was thrown out the window. We’re removing all barriers. Now, of course, if you want to join us for The Activation Method and get reactivated, you can always reach out to someone on our team, either through the website at ThePowerfulMan.com or simply go to the Facebook group, raise your hand. A lot of our alumni advisors are there. Our alumni are advocates, so it’s cool to see them hold their hands up. But these are men just like you who’ve been in the position you’re in now and have gone to the other side. So, guys, I love to see you in there either way. Let’s take some action. Have an amazing day. We’ll see you next time. The Powerful Man show