Close this search box.

Director Of First Impressions

Episode #350

What is your presence online like?

Do you have social media profiles – Facebook, LinkedIn, Instagram…maybe even some of the newer ones?

If so, are you active there? Do you regularly check them? Update them? Post to them?

Your social media shows how you as a man are represented in the world before you get there. Do not be fake. There is nothing worse than meeting somebody who’s been lying and misrepresenting themselves. Be a complete version of yourself.

Share the lifestyle and the philosophies that you live by. People find this kind of genuineness very appealing. The more you share the more it strengthens your identity.

In this episode, we are going to talk about being The Director of First Impressions, what your social media is doing for you, how to have the assurance that your reputation is being upheld above and beyond what is needed, and how important it is to audit your first impressions.


Hungry for more?

Head over to our BONUS page for special access to some of the deeper tactics and techniques we’ve developed at The Powerful Man. 

Also listen on:



Episode Transcript

Doug Holt  0:00  

Google somebody who you’re trying to meet. Almost all of us do. Not every time, but before you go to Google, you Google their name Facebook comes up, LinkedIn comes up. It gives it a click. Is that representative of your professionalism, your organization, the husband, you are the man that you are? What’s going on there? You tell me you want to save your marriage, and I go on to your Facebook page. No pictures of your family or your wife. Bullshit. You may think you want to do it, but you’re unconsciously committed not to because otherwise, you’d be showcasing you’re hiding stuff. Hello, everyone, and welcome to another episode of The Powerful Man show. I am your host, Doug Holt, with my co-host Tim The Powerful Man Matthews. What’s going on, brother? 

Tim Matthews  0:42  

Yeah, I’m good. You?

Doug Holt  0:48  

I’m doing good also, man. It’s okay. I’m used to it. We just got done filming an awesome episode. I liked that one. I like that we talked about pulling out the route, and I think it’s a common issue many guys face. So guys, if you haven’t listened to that one, please go back and check that one out. Because I think that’s going to help a lot of guys.

Tim Matthews  1:13  

And I think it’s a common problem to face in life, health, and business relationships. It was our power to look at a symptom versus a root cause. Yeah, I was going to say I booked a mountain leader training this morning. 

Doug Holt  1:30  


Tim Matthews  1:31  

Yeah. So you have to do it, you have to get your quality mountain days, and then you do a five-day training course. Then you go on to tell you what you’ve got to improve on, and then you go and do another 20 Mountain days to consolidate, and then you do your assessment. So yeah, that’ll be a nice milestone. Get into that. So yeah, October, five days in the mountains.

Doug Holt  1:58  

It’s going to be awesome, and then you’ll be certified to lead people in the mountains.

Tim Matthews  2:02  


Doug Holt  2:03  


Tim Matthews  2:05  

I know, but it’s great. Circle of mountains. breathwork, nature, awesome

Doug Holt  2:16  

awesome. Well, talking about the guys in the inner circle and the guys in The Brotherhood. I know, on this podcast lately? Well, gosh, lately, for the last several months, we’ve had a big focus on relationships because we know it’s a big pain point for many successful married businessmen out there, and it’s one of the things we solved through The Activation Method. But one of the other things that we go through that most people don’t realize is that many guys continue through The Brotherhood. We talk a lot about business there, and now all of a sudden, you’re surrounded by woke men, to use a popular term, woke men, who are also high-level business guys. So these guys are standing in their power as we like to use that term, and they’re crushing it at home. They’re crushing it in the bedroom, and they’re crushing it at work, and they’re exchanging ideas, and we take them through a series of training, and what are the things we talked about? Because these guys use it also as a network, imagine being connected to a large number of men who are great guys who’ve invested in themselves to save their marriages and help their families. No jerks do that, period. So all men have integrity, and now you’re connected to all these high performers from around the world? Well, one of the things we talked about is, what is your presence online? Right. So your LinkedIn profile, your Facebook profile, your director of first impression is like how I like to look at it. So many people before they may speak to Tim Matthews might look them up, and they might go Okay, who is Tim Matthews typing into Google? Don’t we all do that? Right? Take a search, and if you’re going to a meeting with somebody, I did this recently, Tim, we’re looking at bringing on someone in the area of finance for a higher level financial objects within the movement, and I looked this person up, ended up finding out that this person, I know a lot of the same people and we had a common thread. This person’s a woman. 

She was from Santa Barbara, lived in Santa Barbara, California, where I live, and was very connected to the business community. The point is if this is your director of first impressions,  so I met her online,  in theory, because I never talked to her before I met her. So I saw her LinkedIn profile as our Facebook profile that’s as far down the rabbit hole as I went. But just to get an idea of who this person is, I was interviewing for a potential position within our organization. Now we talk about this with many guys, and what happens with a lot of us high-performance businessmen, we’re crushing in all these areas. You’re making money, and you’re doing all these things. But we Don’t take time to look at our profile. We might be on LinkedIn. But have you checked it recently? You might be on Facebook, but what does that showcase about you, or maybe it’s a dead profile? Maybe you started a Twitter account in 1999 but never went back to it. You got a picture of yourself when you were 22, and now you’re 43, or whatever the deal may be. So, that’s what I want to talk about a little bit about Tim, and how for a lot of us guys, and then the men out there, that we want to make sure that the first thing that enters a room is our presence, but also a lot of people before they even enter that room have already looked us up and so what does that director of first impressions look like for you and guys will have a worksheet and checklists, you can go through at the end of this, I’ll give that link to you. So you can go ahead and use some of these tools just to make sure you have a check on yourself.

Tim Matthews  5:55  

Honestly, I struggle with this, and the reason why I struggle with it is that I feel I can find myself wrestling between wanting to make sure there’s a particular presence, seen,  portraying a particular presence, while at the same time, not caring what people think, to a degree because I’ve been in a place in my life, where I cared so much about how I looked, and what people thought of me. Can I run my life? So inevitably, I’ve gone through phases, admittedly had gone through phases over the past few years where I’ve been present online, but enjoying it and loving sharing my thoughts, loving, sharing ideas, loving just sharing things, rather than creating a presence sharing, to then not wanting to share, because then it gets sucked into the social media. Blackhole, because you go on there to share something, and then you, I don’t know about you. But for me, I see something else, and before I know it, something that was just a two-minute share has turned into a 10-minute loss of time. So at the same time, I see the value in this 100%. I think it’s an absolute necessity, especially for you and me, to impact the world in a way that we want to impact, and you do a great job of this, by the way. But yeah, for me, it’s something that I honestly struggle with because of the reasons I’ve just mentioned.

Doug Holt  7:38  

Yeah, I understand that, and you do a really good job of just being authentic. I think that’s one of your skill sets. So what I’m not talking about here, putting out a fake persona to the world at all. What I’m talking about here is, well, here’s an analogy I’ll use. So your professional businessman and a dad, you’re going to a barbecue, so to speak, not you Tim, but in general, you’re going to a barbecue. Do you put on a decent shirt? So a clean black t-shirt and some shorts and some sandals? Or do you grab a dirty shirt out of the hamper with stains on it? holy board shorts with holes all over them?  and tattered, beat-up shoes? No, you don’t. You take a moment, make sure you have a clean shirt, you make sure it’s just a basic presence. It’s you’re this is me. I wear a black t-shirt, board shorts, surf shorts, and sandals, and live in the mountains. So it’s just where I grew up; I grew up near the beach in Orange County, California, and then I’ve lived in Santa Barbara, California, after that. So that’s just kind of who I am. But is it a clean version of you? And you like me, Tim, you look people up on the line all the time, and yes, you can get caught down in the rabbit hole of Facebook, Instagram, Linkedin, etc. I don’t get caught in that rabbit hole. So it doesn’t bother me; I look for the person I’m going to speak to so I have context, especially if I’m going to hire the person if I’m going to do a big deal. Let’s say it’s whatever it is, hundreds of 1000s of dollars or millions of dollars in a business deal. I want to know who I’m working with and what kind of values they may have, and sometimes you can get in this may be a false perception. 

But sometimes, you can get a little bit of an idea of who you’re talking to by seeing the kinds of things they’re posting. Right. It could be tons of political stuff. It could be tons of conspiracy things that I’ve seen with many people wing, left-wing, whatever it is. Or You and I were looking for someone to help us with a little bit more PR marketing at one point, and I remember checking out people’s LinkedIn profiles. They weren’t using their LinkedIn, and these are marketing people, and their LinkedIn profile was horrible. No background picture, an old picture. The title wasn’t good; old jobs that had no relevancy or they had eight jobs open is present, so what’s their bandwidth like and If you’re going to tell me you’re an expert in your field, and you’re active on LinkedIn yet, the things that you’re posting are means of cats. come on. It’s going to give me some idea of what it is you’re doing, and I think a lot of people, so this came up with a lot of guys. In The Brotherhood, they all agreed; they all looked each other up. Everybody does. Everyone who Googles somebody, when you’re trying to meet them. Almost all of us do. Not every time, but before you go to Google, you Google their name, Facebook comes up, LinkedIn comes up, you give it a click. Right? Is that representative of you? Is that representative of your professionalism, your organization, the husband, you are the man that you are? Right? What’s going on there? You tell me you want to save your marriage, and I go on to your Facebook page and don’t have anything, no pictures, your family, your wife? Bullshit on a call bullshit on you may think you want to do it. But you’re unconsciously committed not to, right? Because otherwise, you’d be showcased that you’re hiding stuff. Hey, sorry to interrupt the show. But I wanted to ask you a question. 

Do you ever feel like something’s just missing, like there’s something more out there, and you just can’t put your finger on it. I get it. Go over right now to ThePowerfulMan.com/Bonus to discover the system that other businessmen just like you are using. We’ve included 10 case studies, ten men just like you who have found the solution and found their way on their path. But we want to share that with you; go over to ThePowerfulMan.com/Bonus right away. Now let’s get back to the show. So we want to look at this from a holistic perspective. As business owners, as leaders, we sometimes forget that our staff is also looking, our staff is checking us out, our staff is looking at our customers, our potential customers, our inner competitors, are looking us up, and people are reaching out to us. They are checking to see what it looks like, a. Yout to make sure well, there are so many nuances to it you need a checklist to go through it, and that’s why we put together a quick checklist for social media checklists that every business owner should run through, you should run it through in your business, you should run through on your personal. So I’ll give you guys a URL at the end where you can go ahead and download that for free. Right? download that checklist and run through it and you gotta ask yourself, as you’re going through this checklist, does this represent me? If I had imagined you got an assistant, that assistant would meet with everybody that you’re potentially meeting with 20 minutes before you get there. 

That assistant is going to tell them a couple of things about you. Right? Hey, Tim Matthews will be here in an hour to meet with you about potentially taking over the finances, the financial optics for The Powerful Man. I just want to mention a couple of things about Tim Matthews first. Whatever is on your profile. That’s what social media is doing for you. That is that representative that’s getting there before the meeting before you get there.  as a consultant, as a CEO, as a business owner, myself, I’m busy. But I still take a moment for big important meetings,  wherever side of the table I’m sitting on to look up that person that I’m going to meet. So I have a little background so that I can talk to him about a few things and Tim, you were there. Right? The first time we got on a call with this woman said, Hey, you live in Santa Barbara, California and she was shocked. Hey, how is this person? That changed the whole conversation? Right? It opened up a different level of connectivity and let her know that she knows, well guess what? I know him just as well, and that just sets the tone, and there are just certain things that you can do when you’re looking at this guy’s, so you want to run through this checklist. I don’t want it’s an easy topic. Social media is boring. But something we’re not talking about is social media, and I’m talking about how you as a man are represented in the world before you get there. Because sometimes, you won’t have the opportunity to correct that because you don’t know it’s something that needs to be corrected. somebody’s not they’re not going to tell you, oh, man, and you’re professional and photographer. I went to you. I was on your LinkedIn page, and those photos are horrible or have nothing about photography on there. You want to represent my company through your art and your photography. Yet, you can’t do it yourself, heck no. or whatever else it may be, or you’re in the oil and gas business, and yet you’re posting all these political things on social media. No, no need to do business with you. So these things do come up, or you just your profiles are not professional.  If you guys go to any of my pages, Tim makes fun of me quite often, and I have a picture, and it’s a picture of me, I swear, it looks just like me. But it’s a picture of me from probably seven years ago. Right

Tim Matthews  15:12  


Doug Holt  15:13  

About seven, I was thinking about the other day. So I do need to update that. But I don’t think it would throw it off too much, and here at The Powerful Man, we give everybody a hard time. We like yeah, we’re giving you a hard time. So this is something that you want to look at if this is your director of first impressions. In other words, this is that person that shows up to the meeting before you do your reputation. This is worth grabbing the checklist, printing it out, and running through it.

Tim Matthews  15:42  

Yeah, I’d agree. I think back to when the power of man first started, and it was all very much by accident. But anyway, the thing that drove it within the first five months, we generated about 208k in sales with no website, no funnel, no paid ads, no testimonials. Well, the thing that I did then, and I didn’t do it intentionally, but looking back, it’s the thing that drove everything was how I was. I was sharing primarily through Facebook, while I was sharing the lifestyle pictures that I had the philosophies that I lived by just things I shared. In terms of a director of first impressions, it made it very appealing for many people who set a great model for certain things. So yeah, I see the value in it, for sure. I think as well, for me when looking back, the thing that I like about this, this is going a bit deeper than maybe what you were explaining a moment ago, but whenever I do for a little bit of attention on this, I do share, I enjoy sharing. 

Doug Holt  16:58  


Tim Matthews  16:59  

And it’s like a feedback loop. The more I share, the more it strengthens who I am, and more it strengthens my identity and why I’m here, what I’m doing, and all that fun stuff. Which, by default, then pays off in other areas, be with Amelia, be in business, be whatever it pays off behind the scenes. So yeah, there are a lot of other benefits that you can experience from doing this.

Doug Holt  17:23  

Yeah, it’s not only just sharing, but it’s like, again, looking at your profile. So another example would be recently for the movement. We call it The Powerful Man. You asked me to look over the marketing. Hey, can you just go through? I have a background of over 20 years in Mark digital marketing? Hey, can you go through the marketing?  I utilized this checklist, and I found The Powerful Man will have over 30,000 inquiries. You can check out on our Google Analytics and our page, our social media page, we had somebody on the team cell phone number and how many people have been calling this poor guy trying to get information on The Activation Method or the brother of one of our programs and so it’s the power of things slipped through the cracks. That’s why checklists are so important. It’s why checking in auditing, your director of first impressions, is so important, and we’re not perfect at it. Guys. I don’t want to say that by any means. But the point being is you want I want you guys to take a moment to do this because they’re quick fixes. This is going to take you 1520 minutes, guys, to run through it. But it’s going to assure you that your reputation is being upheld, above and beyond what’s needed. So if you guys want this checklist? We have a simple one that we put together just for you for the listeners. Go over to ThePowerfulMan.com/SocialCheck just all together one word, no hyphens. That’s ThePowerfulMan.com/SocialCheck, and you can download the checklist that we’re talking about. But run through that checklist, pass it off.

That’s the link to people on your team. Right or the checklist off, we’re happy to have you share it. Make sure everybody on your team, their social media is good. One of the things Tim that I’m doing is running through the people that are front of front-facing. So all our advisor’s guys, if you’re interested in The Activation Method, we make you get on a call with alumni. That’s a man who’s already been through the program. So the guy just like you, you get on a call with alumni who’ve been through the program, and so we’re running through their social media to make sure. Hey, look, because I’d want to know who the heck is Doug Holt? Possibly, or Tim Matthews or Arthur Boolean et or whoever it may be. Mark Smith, some of the coaches that we have, I’m going to look them up and you would find on my page Doug, Doug’s a father, okay, that’s important to him. He’s been a serial entrepreneur most of his life. He’s married and his wife posts pictures of them. So obviously, she’s not she; they’re in a good place—things of that nature. You’d want to know, and I think that’s important. It’s authentic. It’s authentic, and I think that’s the key to your first point. Tim is you guys, and you don’t want to be fake because there’s nothing worse than meeting somebody online or meeting somebody at a business event, which you have one version of this persona they’ve been putting out. Then you meet them in person, and it’s wrong. 

They’ve been lying the whole time. Right? That’s horrible. Just be yourselves. But be a complete version of yourselves. Be a complete version. So when that representative shows up at the meeting, before you, they give an accurate portrayal of who you are, the professional, you are, the industry leader, you are the man you are, and that’s what I want for you guys. So guys, make sure you go over there. It’s The Powerful Man.com forward slash social check. It’s specifically made for business owners. So as a business owner, this will be helpful to you. It’s not going to be helpful. If you’re not, we want to go over there and get that and then look at your profiles and run through it for 15 minutes. Simple, easy, but like most things globally, guys, the simple and easy don’t get done. You don’t get the results, and I want those results for you. So, gentlemen, that is another wrap for us here at The Powerful Man show. Have an amazing week. Remember, the moment insight and take massive action. I’ll see you next time.