THE TOP 3 REASONS WHY YOUR WIFE DOESN’T WANT TO HAVE SEX WITH YOU
[AND WHAT TO DO ABOUT IT]
I’m about to share something that might offend some of you, but it’s the truth…
…AND it’s based on the experience of working with HUNDREDS of men struggling with this exact problem and seeing them turn it around
Hold on, maybe this is your wake up call…
#1: YOU’RE ENTITLED
A common pitfall I see men making when they come to us is that they’ve turned their relationship into a transaction.
The common story going on in the head of the men is this:
“She doesn’t appreciate how hard I work. That I’m doing this for us.
She doesn’t understand what it’s like”
The problem with this (one of many) is it breeds entitlement and sub-consciously you start keeping score.
“I did that for her, so she should do this for me”.
And usually, the main thing these men think their wives should do for them is have sex with them.
They don’t say this, and often, they don’t see it either and it silently breeds resentment and creates a void between.
And with every word that goes unsaid the void gets bigger.
It’s kinda like there’s a piece of glass between you and your partner.
At the beginning of the relationship, the glass is clean, you clearly see each other.
As the relationship goes on, with every word that gets unsaid, every emotion that gets stuffed down you throw mud at the glass.
Over time, the glass gets so muddy that you can’t see the other person for who they really are.
They’re still there, but you can’t see it.
Here’s the reality…
You aren’t doing this for ‘US’ you’re doing it for ‘YOU’, and that’s OK.
I’m sure your wife would be just as happy if you had a job somewhere paying you less but you came home every night with a smile on your face.
And you were loving and fun to be around.
You’re doing this because you’ve got a desire inside of you that MUST be filled.
You want to live up to your potential and that’s a GREAT thing.
And appreciate the woman in your life.
Pay her attention because you love her, she doesn’t owe you anything.
You’re CHOOSING to be with one another, remember that and respect it.
She might be around for much longer if you don’t.
#2: SHE DOESN’T FEEL YOU
I used to secretly watch porn instead of seducing my ex-fiance and for a long time, I blamed it on her.
“Well she’s just gonna turn me down anyway, so what’s the point even trying?”
Night after night this gets tiring, and eventually, I gave up.
But I now understand the real reason why she used to say no…
…SHE DIDN’T FEEL ME
I’d leave the house at 6 AM and then get home at 7 PM or 8 PM.
All-day I’d be too busy to speak to her.
She’d call me and I’d let it ring off thinking that if it’s that important then she’ll call back or text me.
Honestly, if her name didn’t appear on my phone she’d barely enter my head all day!
[Pretty bad, right?]
By the time I got home at 7 PM/8 PM I was exhausted and wanted to be on my own.
The only way I knew to cope with the stress was to comfort eat, drink an ice-cold beer, and zone out in front of the TV.
What I realize now is that back then I was numbing myself so I wouldn’t feel my stress or the fears of failing, or even the shame of how selfish I was being.
And here’s the thing…
When you numb yourself you’re not connected to yourself and in that place, it’s impossible to connect with anyone else.
Women are emotional creatures, they work off feeling.
For the woman in your life to want to have sex with you, she’s gotta feel your presence.
ALL of your presence.
This is what attracted her in the first place, right?
If you’re in the position I was the find another way to calm your mind BEFORE you get home.
Learn to delegate better in your business so you can work less.
Understand when enough is enough and be satisfied with that so you’re not constantly chasing the next thing.
#3: SHE DOESN’T TRUST YOU
Remember the mud on the glass?
This is kinda like that.
She’s grown tired of your broken promises to be home on time.
Of you forgetting your anniversary.
That you never ask her how her day was.
And that work is always more important than EVERYTHING else.
How would it make you feel if you were in a relationship with someone like that?
The reality is, you wouldn’t be in a relationship like that – you’d leave (and quite rightly).
A relationship (and your sex life) is like a bank account.
You’ve gotta make deposits before you can make a withdrawal.
And, there should always be afloat in there otherwise you’re going to go overdrawn.
If you’re anything like me, the only things I action are the items on my calendar.
So look at your calendar – how much time have you dedicated in the past week to investing meaningfully into your relationship?
Planning date nights. Doing date nights. Cooking dinner together. Eating together.
Just like anything in your life, your relationship will only grow with focus and intention.
Every Monday schedule it in your calendar to plan a date night for that week.
A few nights a week schedule it in your calendar to finish work early, turn your phone off and intentionally play in her world.
Understand her love language and love her in the way that she wants to be loved.
BONUS #4: BECAUSE YOU’RE NOT LEADING
Women want to be led by the man in their life.
Even the strongest of female leaders want to come home to a man to who they can surrender.
This means – he’s gotta be strong enough and present enough to hold that space for her.
If you’re letting people, situations or life push you around instead of taking a stand for what you want and what you believe then you won’t be able to hold that space.
Some men do take a stand and they still struggle to hold space – see #1 and #2.
This one happens when you’re out of balance.
Most men let life push them around out of wanting to be Mr. Nice Guy and not ruffle any feathers.
Or they do it out of desperation.
Both of these turn women OFF.
They want to see you stand firm, tall, and in your POWER otherwise, how can she count on you?
Every area of your life is touching.
There is NO way you can be avoiding at home and leading FULLY in your business – won’t happen.
Most businessmen that come to The Alpha Reset are operating at 20/30% of their potential even though they’re in the top 1% of income earners.
There you go, if this has resonated with you, you have a choice.
Take what I’ve shared and done something with it.
Or, move onto the next article, forget what I’ve said in the next minute or so and continue to complain about a lack of sex.
You now know the truth – embrace it.
Or, quit complaining.
BE THE POWERFUL MAN YOU WERE BORN TO BE!
Drop a comment below if this has resonated with you, I’d love to hear your takeaways from this…
If you have remained any questions, please contact us!
Last update of the article: 10/23/2020